10. Suni (Etats-Unis)
22/12/05
Speeding
I am observing myself driving a classic Corvette convertible along arural highway. My hair is long, black and pulled back into a ponytail. (In waking life my hair is a mixture of blonde and gray.) I'm having a grand time. There are lots of cars ahead and behind me, all of us speeding. As I come near a town, the cars in front of me vanish. Drats ! Now it will be easier for the cops to single me out for speeding. I wonder if I should slow down. Nope, I'll take my chances. I'll just keep an eye out for the cops. As I enter the town, the Vette changes to a coupe. Traffic is stopped at a light. As I'm pulling up, a car that was parked on the right of the road wishes to enter traffic.
I make a half-hearted attempt to stop so he can back out onto the road. By the time I stop, there isn't much space. As he backs into the road, he looks at me. I sheepishly mouth that my brakes are out. He accepts this, pulls forward into the parking area and goes against traffic to find a place to enter farther back in line. As I pull out of town, there's a dip in the road. I look down and see the pavement very clearly. I desire to apply my brakes but worry that the guy in the car will see this and think I wasn't telling the truth.
Comments
I feel that this, on one level, relates to my feeling that things are "accelerating", and I'm cramming for a final exam, so to speak. So my response seems to be to "drive myself" and speed forward on my path (high-way) in my vehicle (body).
Persistence and Discipline
I come in to sub for R's class of highschool students. * The classroom is a large three walled room that opens out into additional classroom
space outside. There is also a covered walkway. The ground is sand. (I don't recall any trees / plants.) I'm standing outside, looking around. I see R sitting at her desk, in the enclosed portion, happily shuffling some papers. I don't understand why I've been called in if she's there, but accept it. Although, I'm not quite sure what I'm supposed to do now.
I see an empty student desk outside to sit in while waiting for instructions. It is grouped with three other desks and three students. We all begin moving the desks around to find a level spot. The students move their desks away from mine. For a brief moment this makes me feel isolated, but then I realize I'm not one of them. I look down and see the ground is sand. There is a depression in the ground and some fire ants. Don't want to put my desk there !
I'm standing and notice that a tide has come in. The sandy ground becomes covered with about 7-8" of water. I notice that the lunch and
drink that I had brought from a fast-food restaurant is on the ground, thus under water. I know that the students say it, and can't believe that they would be so inconsiderate as to not pick it up before the water spoiled it.
I move to the enclosed area of the classroom. I find a seat near the entrance with a group of 2-3 students. I am shot in the left ear with
a red, very thin (Don't know what these are called. The arrow- like "bullet" with a suction cup on the end that's shot from a
child's play gun.). It sticks to my eardrum. This doesn't harm me. In fact I find it humorous, but know that this behavior is not conducive to a learning environment, and it could lead to someone getting hurt. I want to nip it in the bud, so to speak.
I notice a group of 4 students across the room in an upper left corner and realize that it came from them. They are all laughing and cutting up. I ask the one that I think did it what his name is. It is Paul or Pole. (Couldn't understand it clearly.) I ask him to come to me. As he is walking to me, he removes a cap (or something), and I realize that he's a girl. I tell her that we're going to the Principal's office to set up a day in ISS (in school suspension). She couldn't believe it! Everyone thought I was overreacting, even R. Their thought is that after all, it wasn't THAT bad! I understand the students reaction, but I'm a bit annoyed at R's nonchalant attitude. She should know better. I thought, "No wonder this class is so unruly."
She (the student) refuses to come with me. I'm not certain what to do. I realize that I'm going to have to use physical means to get her to come with me, since I know that she will not listen to / learn from reason. But what can I do that will not hurt her? I think of something, although I'm not sure this is allowed. But I have to do something! I can't just allow this unruly situation to continue. So I reach out and grab her hair at the crown of her head and twist it. She reacts in surprise and mild pain, holding her head / hair with her hands. Although I know that she's feeling a bit of pain, I know it's not as bad as she is portraying it. Talk about over-acting! I feel bad, but it's the best thing I can think of to do to get her to move. As I begin to walk to the Principal's office, I have to twist her hair even more to get her to walk with me. She's being very stubborn, which merely causes her more pain.
(I am not sure that this is where this scene goes. It might have been at a different time / location in the dream.) I go into a small classroom. R is there with two other teachers. There is a huge table in the center of the room. R has a piece of nice mauvy / violet fabric that she is happily cutting to make into some drapes. She begins talking with me. I look around for my fast-food drink, find it, and pick it up for a sip. I look over at the other two teachers who are working on a valance with 5 or 6 "poofs". I think it's ugly. It is out of a print fabric that's okay, but they are not doing a great job of filling the poofs. They are all lumpy and misshapen. Somewhere in here I realize / learn that in R's class there are two teachers and two aides. One of the two working on the valance is an aide, and I am a substitute for the other aide. Now her being in the classroom (at the beginning of the dream) makes sense.
Outside of the classroom, she (the student) gets lose and runs off. Uh, oh! Got to find her. I see a restaurant with masses of students hanging around outside. I decide that she must have gone in there. As I go inside, I look at my watch. It's about a quarter til 6. I realize that since I usually get home about 3:30, hubby will be concerned. I need to call him. But first, I have to find this girl and get her to the Principal's office.
There are masses of students inside also. It's more of a hang out than restaurant. I look around for the girl, but don't see her. I know it's useless, but I ask many of the students if they have seen her. Yeah, right ! Like they are going to rat her out. Of course, although the students are respectful, the replies are "No". I get irritated. The students feel this. A student tells me that she is one of five students know for their unorthodox behavior. One student finally tells me she is upstairs.
I walk around to the back of the restaurant, looking around for the stairs. I'm anxious because I know that time is short, I need to hurry. If she finds out I'm in here looking for her she will run away again. I see two sets of stairs. I walk over to the one on the right. It is beautifully carved and polished wood. It's way beyond a spiral. It very compactly flows around and through itself. Many of the students enjoy using it because it's fun. They can leap and crawl on it. I realize that it will take to long to get upstairs via this stairway. So I back off and look at the other stairway. It's very plain and goes straight up. Ah, much faster. I choose it.
Upstairs I see her sitting on a sofa. She's surprised that I found her. I grab her hair again. I warn her that if she keeps up this running away, she will just be spending more days in ISS.
Back downstairs, I see a telephone at the bar. I stop to call hubby. Before I can place the call, she disappears again ! Well, crud ! I run outside to look for her. I search and search, but she's no where around. I am upset. I can't believe that I've actually lost a student ! What will the administration think of me !
Finally, I decide to just give up, for now. I decide that I will return to school/classroom in the morning and "nab" her then.
The next morning, she's surprised to see that I'm back. I grab her hair, again. This time I run my arm around her neck and pull her to me for a better hold. Her head is against my breast / heart. Every now and then she gives in and relaxes her head against me. This fills me with great compassion. At these times I relax my grip, hug her tight and put my chin on the crown of her head.
* The arrangement and proportions of the walkway, classroom and outside area remind me of the spiral of a nautilus shell.
Comments
These two dreams came from an incubation for the Earth Cry project - "This night, in my dreams, I hear the cry of the earth and I reply".
In waking life I am a substitute teacher for all grades ata rural public school. R. is my husband's only child. She's in her mid-30's, is married and has two children. Teaching is not her career.
For the Earth Cry project, I might think this dream is showing me that my best response would be to persist in attempting discipline my mind (head/hair).
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